By Anna Davies.
The people of the Gold Coast have a problem – they seem to believe that winter doesn’t exist.
Every year it’s the same story. We walk around in bikinis and board shorts for months on end, then enter fits of panic as the temperature slips below 20 degrees. “OMG it’s so cold” you remark, while wearing thongs, “I can’t believe it!” exclaims your neighbour as if it’s the first time they’ve ever had to wear long pants.
Winter literally happens every year, yet we seem to get caught off guard every. damn. time. Don’t panic, here’s a fashion survival guide to help you through the gruelling winter month(s).
1. Wear layers when it’s actually appropriate
Here’s how it usually works. You wake up in the morning at 7am, look on your phone and discover it’s below 15 degrees. You rummage through your wardrobe and find the warmest hoodie or jacket you own, slip it over the top of your cut off denim shorts and singlet, the perfect climate control ensemble. You go out, ready to face the day. The clock strikes 1pm, it’s hot. Thank god you layered. Peel off your hoodie to reveal the outfit you were wearing last month, when it was 30 degrees. Surprise, surprise, it’s too cold now. If you want to layer, layer over clothes that are actually winter appropriate. More often than not, you’ll find wearing enclosed shoes and long pants will do the trick.
2. Wear UGG boots when it’s actually appropriate
If I had a dollar every time I saw some poor lost soul wearing Ugg boots and shorts I wouldn’t be writing this blog. I’d be in the Bahamas on a yacht, not having to worry about winter at all. I personally believe that Ugg boots belong indoors, out of the public eye. Aside from the fashion-faux pas they are in no way designed for the outdoors – step in a puddle and you will have that puddle haunt you for the rest of your day. If you really, truly believe that Ugg boots are the only option. The only boot that will keep your feet an appropriate temperature. The only shoe that will see you through the winter months. Please, for the love of God, wear them with long pants. If it’s not cold enough to wear them with long pants, it’s not cold enough to wear them at all.
3. Wear clothes that aren’t designed for the beach
If you take any advice from this post, let it be this. You can’t keep on pretending it’s summer. Summer is over. Winter is here. We both know you’re not about to hop in the water anytime soon so for the love of god please stop wearing board shorts and kaftans. Your toes will not be between the sand in the foreseeable future, so put away the thongs. Wear shoes that cover your feet, and wear clothes that are thicker than 2ply toilet paper. Aim for at least a 4ply, you deserve it girlfriend.