Controlling behaviour is a major red flag in any relationship—and it often extends far beyond emotional or physical abuse. Financial abuse is an increasingly common and damaging form of control and it can be especially frightening if you’re already in debt.
Financial abuse is often overlooked or minimised, and many people feel embarrassed to talk about it. But recognising the signs and reaching out early is essential.
What Does Financial Abuse Look Like?
Financial abuse can take many forms. Some signs to watch for include:
- Being forced to take out loans or credit in your name
- Having your bank account login details taken or changed
- Someone adding their name to your account without your consent
- Money being spent by someone who promised to use it for bills or groceries—but didn’t
- Being asked to justify or explain every purchase
- Being stopped from accessing your own banking or credit accounts
- Being told what you can or can’t spend your money on
- Being coerced into cancelling or changing insurance policies
If any of these sound familiar, talk to someone you trust and seek professional help.
Debt and Mental Health
Debt is stressful for anyone, but the emotional toll is especially heavy for single parents. Managing bills, childcare, and basic living expenses on one income is tough—especially for those working part-time to reduce childcare costs. The pressure to be the sole provider can leave parents feeling anxious and overwhelmed.
The Biggest Financial Pressures
Food & Bills
Rent or mortgage aside, single parents say their biggest costs are food and household bills. Many report that bills consume the majority of their income, closely followed by the cost of feeding their families. Worryingly, a significant number say they’ve had to cut back on essentials like groceries or utilities just to make ends meet.
Food prices alone saw a steep rise between early 2022 and early 2024—well above the average increases seen in the previous decade.
Childcare Costs
Childcare continues to be a major financial burden. Single dads are more likely to be working full-time, while many single mums juggle part-time work or unemployment, often due to the demands of childcare.
While working fewer hours can ease childcare expenses in the short term, it can also limit long-term financial security. Many single mothers, in particular, express deep concern about what this means for their financial future.
What Can You Do?
Track Your Progress
Keep a record of small financial wins—like avoiding a takeaway or making a minimum debt payment. These moments serve as reminders of progress when things feel overwhelming.
Talk to Your Lender
If you’re in debt, don’t ignore it. Contact your lender and ask about manageable payment plans. Debt Management Plans (DMPs) can help consolidate and reduce repayments on unsecured debts.
Get Support
Mental health support is just as important as financial advice. Speak to your GP or another mental health professional if you’re concerned about your state of mind.
You’re not alone—and help is available. Reaching out is the first step to regaining control.
