When someone else’s drinking affects the whole family

11 June 20263 min read

Alcohol is often woven into Australia’s social culture. Celebrations, catch-ups and milestones frequently revolve around it. But for some families, alcohol slowly shifts from being social to something far more harmful, affecting not only the person drinking, but everyone around them.

According to the Queensland Government’s Alcohol and Other Drugs Plan 2022–2028, alcohol remains the most harmful substance in the state. While much of the conversation understandably focuses on the person struggling with addiction, the impact on families is often quieter, more hidden and deeply isolating.

For many people living alongside alcoholism, daily life can become shaped by anxiety, unpredictability and emotional exhaustion. Relationships are strained; boundaries blur and household dynamics begin revolving around someone else’s behaviour.

This year marks the 75th anniversary of Al-Anon Family Groups Australia, an organisation offering peer support to people affected by another person’s drinking. Across Australia, more than 330 Al-Anon and Alateen groups now meet each week, both online and in person, including dozens throughout South Queensland.

The groups provide a safe and anonymous space for people to share experiences, learn coping strategies and connect with others facing similar challenges.

One South Queensland member shared how growing up around alcoholism shaped her life long before she sought support.

“My mother’s drinking had been part of my entire life,” she said. “It led to verbal and emotional abuse, and often violence.”

She described living in a constant state of anxiety, particularly in the late afternoons when she knew her mother would begin drinking.

“I would wait for the phone call where I would be blamed for everything that had gone wrong in her life. I was always on high alert and had no idea I even had the choice not to answer.”

Eventually, after years of therapy and emotional exhaustion, she attended her first Al-Anon meeting.

“The meeting was incredibly welcoming. There was a cup of tea, a seat and people from all walks of life who understood what living alongside alcoholism felt like.”

She says what struck her most was the honesty in the room and the lack of judgement.

“People shared openly without interruption or advice. Everyone was at different stages of healing, but there was a sense of understanding that I had never experienced before.”

Twelve years later, she now supports newcomers herself and says the experience transformed not only how she navigates alcoholism in her family, but how she approaches all relationships in her life.

Alcohol addiction can often create shame and silence within families, making it difficult for people to seek support. Organisations like Al-Anon and Alateen aim to break that isolation by reminding people they are not alone and that help exists not only for the person drinking, but for those impacted around them too.

For more information about Al-Anon Family Groups Australia or to find a local meeting, visit Al-Anon Family Groups Australia

Women who golf

Golf might once have had a reputation as a sport for retirees with plenty of time on their hands, but those days are well and truly behind us. Women of all ages are discovering that a round of golf delivers much more than a little friendly competition. In fact, golf has quietly become part of the health and wellbeing conversation, combining exercise, fresh air, mental stimulation and social connection – without necessarily feeling like exercise at all. At Southport Golf Club, that growing interest is easy to see. The club has welcomed 84 new women members over the past two years, all of whom have continued their membership, joining an existing community of around 170 women. Exercise Without the Gym An 18-hole round can clock up more than 10,000 steps and burn around 900 calories. But unlike pounding away on a treadmill, you’re usually far too busy thinking about your next shot, chatting with your playing partners and enjoying the surroundings to notice just how active you’ve been. Walking the course also helps strengthen and tone muscles, while providing regular moderate exercise that can contribute to better cardiovascular health. Good for the Mind, Too There’s something to be said for spending a few hours outdoors. Fresh air, green spaces and physical activity can help reduce stress, improve mood and boost self-esteem, while the release of endorphins can leave you feeling happier, more relaxed and even sleeping better. Regular physical activity can also help reduce the risk of conditions including heart disease, high cholesterol and dementia, supporting our health as we age. Keep Learning Golf is one of those wonderful games you never completely master – which might occasionally be infuriating, but it’s also part of the appeal. Learning new skills, setting goals and challenging yourself keeps the brain engaged and provides a real sense of achievement. Friends, Fun and Connection Perhaps one of golf’s greatest benefits is its social side. It creates opportunities to meet new people, strengthen friendships and enjoy time with family – with plenty of conversation along the way. And you don’t need to be super fit, young or particularly sporty to start. The handicap system allows different abilities to play together, while choosing between nine or 18 holes means golf can fit into busy lives. Exercise, friendship, fresh air and a little healthy competition? Perhaps golf really is onto something.

Health and Wellness

The Rise and Rise of Hypnotherapy

You’ve probably slipped into a hypnotic state today. You just didn’t call it that. Have you ever driven somewhere familiar and suddenly realised you have no memory of the last few kilometres? You weren’t asleep, your attention simply wandered while your brain handled it automatically. We all experience periods of absorbed attention, which can also feel like daydreaming. Hypnotherapy uses that same state, guided deliberately toward a therapeutic goal. You may have heard of the lovely story about a man who asked his gardener what made his plants grow so beautifully. The gardener replied: “I don’t force them to grow. I remove what stops them. I pull out the weeds that are strangling their growth, clear the space around them, and position healthy plants to better receive the sunlight they need.” That is how I think about hypnotherapy. Sometimes old patterns, beliefs and emotional responses have shaped the way we think, feel and behave for years. We may consciously know we want something different, yet still find ourselves responding in the same familiar way. Hypnotherapy aims to explore what’s underneath those patterns, and may help loosen what’s no longer serving us, making room for new ways of thinking, feeling and doing. So, what does hypnotherapy actually feel like? You remain awake and aware. You can hear, speak, think and open your eyes at any time. For many people, hypnosis is experienced as deeply relaxing and focused. The outside world may feel less important as attention becomes absorbed in the therapist’s voice and suggestions. Depending on the goal, hypnosis might involve exploring a different perspective, rehearsing a new response, strengthening confidence or working with an unwanted habit or emotional pattern. But isn’t that just meditation? Not quite. Meditation helps us become still. Hypnotherapy uses that same focused, relaxed state and gives it direction and purpose. Meditation generally aims to cultivate awareness, presence and calm. Hypnotherapy uses focused attention and suggestion towards a specific therapeutic goal, working with thoughts, feelings, behaviours and patterns. What might people seek it for? Stress, anxiety, sleep difficulties, pain management, confidence, self-esteem, unwanted habits and phobias, such as a fear of flying or emetophobia (a fear of being sick), are among the reasons people may explore hypnotherapy. For an HSC student, that might mean a calmer relationship with exams, or reduced performance anxiety. Hypnotherapy isn’t a one-size-fits-all intervention, and no ethical practitioner should promise a particular outcome. What does the science say? For years, some dismissed hypnosis as a parlour trick. Modern neuroscience has given researchers a new way to investigate what actually happens. In a Stanford University study published in Cerebral Cortex, researchers used functional MRI to examine brain activity and connectivity during hypnosis. They observed changes involving networks associated with attention, cognitive control and self-awareness in highly hypnotisable participants. The research doesn’t suggest hypnosis is a magic switch, or that everyone responds the same way. But it does add to growing evidence that something measurable is happening in the brain during hypnosis. From athletes to celebrities and royalty Hypnosis has moved a long way from its stage-show associations. Athletes have explored hypnosis, visualisation and mental rehearsal as part of performance preparation. Dual Olympian Jodi Winter has spoken about her own experience of hypnotherapy, describing coming away feeling “deeply relaxed, clearer and lighter”, and the easing of anxiety she had carried for much of her life as “incredibly freeing.” Catherine, Princess of Wales, has spoken about using hypnobirthing techniques to help her cope with hyperemesis gravidarum, a severe pregnancy sickness condition, as well as during the birth of her three children. Perhaps high performers understand something the rest of us are increasingly recognising: the mind isn’t separate from performance. It is part of it. So why is hypnotherapy rising now? We’re surrounded by notifications, screens and constant demands for our attention, yet many struggle to switch off, sleep, feel confident or simply feel like themselves. Hypnotherapy offers something increasingly precious: deep, focused attention. For many women juggling work, family and everyone else’s needs, that kind of undivided attention on themselves is rare, and it can feel like coming up for air. In a world of surface-level, instant dopamine hits, depth is becoming essential. If that’s something you’re drawn to exploring, who you choose to guide you there matters. Choosing a hypnotherapist When choosing a hypnotherapist, know that the profession, like counselling, is unregulated. Look for the title ‘Clinical Hypnotherapist,’ and as a benchmark, ideally one who is a member of the Australian Society of Clinical Hypnotherapists (ASCH) or the Australian Hypnotherapists Association (AHA), both of which ensure high educational standards, ongoing supervision and continued training. With the right support, there’s a chance to learn something wonderfully new. Disclaimer: This article is for general information only and is not intended to replace medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. If you have a mental health concern, speak with your GP or another appropriately qualified healthcare professional. About the author Justine Williams Founder of The Feel Good Studio and Hyp Little Fairy Tales® Affectionately known as The Fairy Godmother for her work supporting children, parents and families. A highly regarded Clinical Hypnotherapist, speaker and multi-award-winning author. Website Email

By Justine Williams

Health and Wellness

A House in the Making – A Scent of things to come

For Paul James Graham, ‘Spencer Rambo’ represents the culmination of more than two decades immersed in hair, fashion and creative direction — and the beginning of something much larger. An award-winning hairdresser, educator, creative director and brand ambassador, Graham’s career has extended beyond the salon into education, editorial, competitions, judging, campaigns and major hair productions. That experience – and a reputation built over many years – now forms part of the foundation of Spencer Rambo. But Graham is not building it alone. His husband and long-time partner, Paul Dumenil, brings a different perspective. Where Graham’s career increasingly carried him beyond the salon, Dumenil remained deeply immersed within it – connected to the client, the craft and the everyday reality of creating beautiful hair. Their strengths are different, but complementary. Somewhere between Graham’s broader industry experience and Dumenil’s intimate understanding of the salon, Spencer Rambo began to take shape. Not simply as another name in haircare, but as a house – with its own point of view on beauty, fragrance, design and luxury. Its first expression is fragrance. CADENCE; In Perfect Time and ICON; Be Remembered are Spencer Rambo’s inaugural Hair & Body Perfumes. Designed to be worn through the hair and across the body, both feature an impressive 25% perfume concentrate, alongside Sodium Acetylated Hyaluronate – an advanced form of hyaluronic acid chosen for its moisture-binding properties and affinity with the hair. The fragrances themselves are deliberately distinct. CADENCE opens with aldehydes and jasmine, moving through clove, orange blossom and jasmine before settling into marine notes, amber and musk – polished, atmospheric and sensual. ICON moves differently: floral notes and vanilla give way to amber and matcha, grounded by musk, ambergris and sandalwood for warmth, depth and lingering sophistication. They are, perhaps, best understood as perfumes that happen to understand hair. CADENCE and ICON are only the first glimpse inside the house Graham and Dumenil are building. What comes next is being kept deliberately close. For now, the clues are in the legacy of their hairdressing careers – a world beginning to reveal itself. CADENCE and ICON are the invitation. Behind them, the doors to Spencer Rambo are only beginning to open. “As professional hairdressers, we never take for granted the trust someone places in us when they invest their time and money in something we create for them. we want them to feel that same genuine value when they choose Spencer Rambo – in the quality, the formulation and the experience. Luxury can be beautiful and aspirational, but above all, it should be truthful — Paul & Paul

Health and Wellness

Why you need to put yourself first

In today’s fast-paced world, it can be easy to focus entirely on your responsibilities – including caring for others – leaving you on the back burner. If you’re constantly prioritising other people, it’s time to take a step back and remember that you deserve some TLC, too. Why is it so hard? There are many reasons why it’s challenging to put yourself first. Our culture for one. If you were surrounded by people telling you taking breaks means laziness or true love means always saying yes, you’ll likely feel pressured to ignore your own needs. Self-discipline, lack of motivation or not knowing how to seek help can also be barriers. You might also perceive the act as selfish, which runs contrary to the essence of prioritising oneself. But here’s why you should. Maybe you’re a parent who must put your children’s needs before your own or the eldest child expected to carry the responsibilities at home. No matter where you are in life right now, here are reasons why you should put yourself first this year. 1 You Risk Burnout When you constantly put other people’s needs above your own, you can drain yourself of energy. You do things like helping a co-worker or doing a favour for your sibling because you feel like you should, leaving you hopeless and exhausted. Show kindness to yourself first so you can show up fully for your loved ones. 2 Your Stress Can Impact Those Around You When was the last time you checked in with yourself and made time for your passion? Occupying yourself with responsibilities can lead to a lifestyle where stress becomes normal. If not addressed, it can affect your health and your relationships with others. 3 You May Lose Yourself in the Process Do you feel like you must be productive all the time? Ask yourself – are you doing it out of necessity or because your inner critic dictates you should achieve goals to be deemed perfect, worthy, and acceptable? It’s time to overcome those internal narratives that may impede your growth.